The Wiener Dog Essay

It's been a year but Charles finally made his way into our weekly essays.  A few weeks ago when I met the quirky Korean man outside the Family Mart, Charlie and I also ran into a few of my students while conversing with our new friend. Mostly, Charles behaved very well around all these new faces. But, if you know my dog, you know he just can't control himself all the time.  He loves to bark and terrify people and there was one boy that got all of Charlie's ummm, "attention".  It's a little game he likes to play. I think it's probably 20% wanting to protect me and 80% (or more) a hysterical game for him.  It also doesn't help that he doesn't have the usual wiener dog "yippy" bark.  He sounds like a Rottweiler and he's awfully proud of it.  Needless to say, this does not make him super popular in a country where dogs are not the most welcome members of society.  Well, I take that back.  He's plenty popular, but not always in a good way.

Moving on, one of the boys that we met on the sidewalk that day decided to write his essay about Charlie last week. He usually brings up Charlie every week in class, but now that he has actually met him, we talk about him even more. This child spends ample time trying to convince me that my dog is not an adequate substitute for a husband. I disagree.  I always tell him that when he starts dating he might change his mind as well. But marriage is a big deal here.  To be 30 and unmarried is not a great thing.  Thankfully, I'm a foreigner.  Foreigners are exempt from most Korean societal expectations.  But that's another blog for another time.

Rambling again...sorry, it's 5am and my body is rejecting sleep.  Onto the essay...

If you were a scientist, what would you choose to research? 

If I were a scientist, I would do my research on my teacher's dog.

First, the teacher's dog likes to eat food like meat because it is low fat and delicious.

It tastes good.

Second, the teacher's dog likes to play about killing people with Teacher Amy.

The teacher's dog likes killing anything.

So, it is good of the teacher's dog.  He protects Teacher.

Third, the teacher's dog likes to bark at Tim because he thinks Tim is very weak and very afraid of dogs.

So, teacher's dog likes to bark at Tim.

So, if I were a scientist, I would do my research on the teacher's dog.

I love my dog.  He's wonderful.